Five things I love about fall!

Despite my 24th fall being my craziest so far due to starting graduate school and planning our wedding, it doesn't change the fact that it is FALL. And fall is by far my favorite season, so I have decided to dedicate this post to the five best things about fall. It is utterly fantastic, for reasons that I have only begun to outline below.

1. School starts. This is why some people DON'T like fall, I guess. But it was never a bummer for me as a child. I was usually ready for summer to be done-zo; I wanted to get back to school with my brightly colored Lisa Frank folders and patterned wooden pencils. The fall semester, rather than New Year's, signals a fresh start in my mind. I suppose I will always be wrapped in academia at this rate, either as a student, a staff member, or a professor (one of these days!).

I think I had all these folders, except for maybe the lame unicorn.

2. The blistering Texas heat finally begins to subside. We natives pull out our fleece jackets when the thermostat gets into the 70s and 80s. Today it is 85 out and my office heater has been on full blast all day. Brr. But there is something about being outside in the crisp autumn air that just makes me feel clean. It is always this season when I begin walking or running outside in the evenings because, for once, my otherwise-cozy apartment makes me feel confined and stuffy. Disclaimer: this feeling dissipates by the time "winter," also known as 50 degrees, arrives. You will find me happily burritoed into a blanket with hot chocolate.

That's me, except not me, but it's what I look like in the fall.

3. The leaves change from boring green into my very FAVORITE, more interesting colors. Deep yellows and reds are just beautiful to me (hence the wedding palette I have chosen!).

No comment needed...it is amazing.

Plus the leaves drift down into awesomely crunchy piles. I didn't really play in piles of leaves, or sand, or mud, when I was little. I really despised being dirty. BUT I still like to crunch the leaves, especially with the toes of my boots, which brings me to...

4. Fall clothes! They are the BEST clothes. Light sweatshirts and the aforementioned fleece jackets, leather dress boots and the clothy, Uggs kind that go over your jeans, sweater dresses with big belts, and... scarves! I broke out my first fall scarf last week and I thought I'd die of happiness when I looped that sucker around my neck in the stylish+warm fashion I learned in Europe.

I had some people model my fall wardrobe.

5. And finally, fall has awesome holidays. It will soon include my wedding anniversary in addition to the currently great holidays that are known as my birthday, Halloween and Thanksgiving. At these holiday celebrations, you get to eat delicious treats with flavors that are the most appropriate in this season, like caramel and cinnamon and apple and pumpkin. What does winter have? Peppermint? Blah. Not a deep or warm flavor at all. (And you can stretch out that Halloween candy for a LONG time.)

Oh, fall treats, the epitome of Good Housekeeping.

Yes, yes, autumn is the most superior season by far. It really makes me want to move to a place where the seasons are more defined, like New England, since none of my reasons for liking fall are decidedly Texan except for the heat going away. Maybe one day! :)

Part II of my Denton transportation saga

**This is a continuation of my last post, so if you didn't read it, you might scroll down and get caught up. But I don't know why you didn't read it before. You had, like, plenty of time. Just kidding. Please don't leave. But really, the last post will catch you up. And thanks to everyone for the comments about the last post through Blogger, Facebook, Twitter and texting or just telling me in person. You guys make it even more fun to write this random story.**

Well, last you read, I left you with a cliffhanger, sort of like Season 4 of Dexter left me last weekend. Season 5 comes on in 2weeks. I'm so stoked. Best show on TV for sure.

Love you, Dex.

ANYway...

The bus' beady little red taillight eyes disappeared, signaling the (traitor) bus driver's foot coming off the brake and therefore departing from the sidewalk. Meanwhile, I continued clicking down the sidewalk, still at a breakneck pace, but certainly not running. As much of a character flaw as it may be, I would definitely NOT run for the bus with all those cars lined up along the sidewalk. Strangers or not, those people do not need to see me lacking self-control and the ability to properly schedule my transportation. For all they know, I am just a super-fast walker. I could probably speedwalk in the Olympics (isn't that a sport now?).

Look at them go! This could be me.

So I continued on down the sidewalk, watching forlornly as the bus got further and further down Bell Avenue. When I reached the center of campus, I turned right and headed back across to the staff parking lot, where my faithful car awaited, not knowing that I had looked into temporarily abandoning it for a greasier, wider piece of vehicular machinery. Despite the wind and the clouds, it was still warm outside, so I blasted the A/C as I rushed to UNT. My almost-heatstroke may have also been accredited to the emotional roller coaster I'd been on because of my new best friend, the Commuter Express, now my ex best friend.

Oooone is the loneliest number...

I'd left 10 minutes later than usual thanks to the bus debacle, so I threw caution to the wind in parking at UNT, and as I crossed the street, I saw my Route 8 bus slithering to a stop at the corner. Hmph. So it appeared that I COULD be on time if I rode the bus, and it did drop off in the spot that I had marked on my map. All that planning would have paid off! Nonetheless, I continued my gold-medal-worthy speed walk all the way to the third floor of my building. I slid into my seat at a cool 2:58 with a whopping two minutes to spare even AFTER I got a drink from the water fountain (and mind you, I did NOT choose to drink the filtered water that UNT offers).

I am SUCH a rebel.

In class, we had to introduce ourselves, which I always love, because... well, why would I write this blog if I didn't like to talk about myself? After I finished my name and background as requested, my professor asked me how the bus worked out, since if you recall, I'd called her to let her know I might be late. I told her, and the class, that I had missed the bus. I also took the opportunity to toss in the fact that, you know, I might try the bus again sometime, so if I was ever late, that was probably the reason why. Way to build in lateness-insulation, right?

As I mentioned in the last post, the storm clouds were really rolling in when I left TWU. Throughout class, we could hear the rumblings of thunder, and finally, the rain began to pour. It's never good when you can tell in a room with no windows how hard it is raining. Upon leaving the building, I have to walk about two or three blocks back to the lot where I park. Since I'm apparently not a responsible person, and am in fact the kind of person who misses her first bus, I was not prepared for the thunderstorm. I had no umbrella, and I had no raincoat... none of those trendy little printed rubber boots either. However, being out in the rain doesn't bother me; in fact, I rather like it, as it is sort of refreshing (as long as you don't think about how dirty rainwater is, but even when I do, I still kind of like it).

So many choices, and yet I have none.

When it came time to leave class, I marched downstairs, made sure I had my keys out and that my bags were zipped tight, grabbed a UNT paper as a makeshift head covering, and ventured out into the rain. The amount of precipitation was deceptively light at the time I went outside, so I figured I'd make it to the car a little damp but with no problem.

Apparently, however, I really needed refreshment.

The heavens completely opened up, and unlike Noah, I had no ark to save me. A sweet girl let me stand under her umbrella as we shivered at the crosswalk, torrents of rain slamming down and cars kicking up puddles as they passed through the intersection. Eventually, I had to abandon Umbrella Girl so I could take off my heels and wade through the shin-deep current. It was then I realized that my day had come full circle. I was left once again with the choice to continue walking and keep my cool, or... to run.

I don't know why. Maybe it was a sense of self preservation, like I wouldn't be as wet. Or perhaps it was that freeing feeling of being soaked by rain. Perhaps it was just because it was pretty dark, and I don't feel like as many people might know me on the streets of UNT as at TWU (which is ridiculous, because who knows me anyway?). Whatever it was, the mood was right... and I ran.

This is what I felt like!

I'm talking, I sprinted. I hauled it down Welch, past frat houses and oncoming cars and smart people with umbrellas AND rainboots. My bare feet kicked up water with every step (which was gross, because in some spots, the groundwater was so warm... ew), and most of it splashed onto me, but I didn't care. I committed to the run. I even kept my head up and angled toward the street, as if challenging the drivers to judge me. And, I made it to the car, soaked to the bone, but I still felt pretty awesome. Sometimes you just have to laugh at the turn of events your day takes.

Apparently it's hard to get across Denton.

For those of you who don't know, there are two primary things I do in Denton, TX. I don't live here, and I don't hang out here, but the majority of my time is definitely spent here. The first thing is that I work full-time at TWU in Lifelong Learning. I create, plan, and manage non-credit programs with a great group of colleagues.

Old Main at TWU (I work in a taller building that isn't as old)

The second is that I'm a graduate student at UNT. I am in the first semester of the MPA program (Masters of Public Administration). After all my waffling and uncertainty about my path after undergrad, I think I landed in the perfect place and program for me.

Idk what this picture is of at UNT, but oooh, a fountain!

I'm taking nine hours this semester, and yesterday, I had my first session of my third class. It is my only class that isn't at night. Because of the parking at UNT at 3:00 in the afternoon, and because I come from TWU to get there, I decided that I would explore taking the Commuter Express bus that picks up here and drops off there. I learned, after poring over DCTA maps and questioning a TWU Commuter Services student assistant's ear off, that my route would look like this:

2:38- Catch the Route 4 bus at TWU
2:48- Arrive at DCTA Central
2:52- Switch to the Route 8 bus
2:58- Get dropped off at UNT (right on the corner of my building's lot!)

Sure, this schedule would only leave me a measly two minutes to actually get into my building and up to my third floor classroom. And maybe I'd have to dodge cars and pedestrians and lost freshmen Frogger-style.

Look out, froggie. I rock at this game.

BUT I wanted to see if it was manageable, so I called my teacher and let her know that if I was a few minutes late, that would be why, and she understood, having had issues with parking her own car at 3:00 (even though it seems when I'm looking for a spot that every lot is faculty/staff- something that would help me at TWU but not so much at UNT).

At 2:30, I excitedly folded up my route map, grabbed my school stuff and my staff ID so I could ride for free, and headed toward the bus stop (about a 3 minute walk from my office). It was windy and much cooler than normal, and the clouds had rolled in, ominously but beautifully dark blue, ready to burst with rain. No umbrella, no matter- I was too ready for my first leap into the world of public transit. How clever am I to take the BUS to class!

Hello, new best friend.

I rounded the corner, 5 minutes early, prepared to wait under the bridge for the bus, only to learn that 1) the bus stop is actually about 30 yards further down the street than I thought. AND, 2) shockingly, the big green bus was already there! A line of impatient cars sat, nowhere to go, blocked like the clogged arteries I will have if I eat that Denny's grilled cheese that has fried cheesesticks in the middle (if you haven't seen that heavenly looking mess, google it). The door to the bus was already open, but no one was in the vicinity. No one but ME. I picked up my pace, clicking away down the sidewalk in my Liz Claiborne Flex heels (so sue me that I wasn't wearing my Madden's).

I don't wear these to work, because I don't work for Kelly Cutrone.

Here is a sample of my thoughts, "I think I can... I can make it... oh for SURE... it's gonna keep sitting there... isn't it?...be cool because all these cars are looking at you... isn't there like a rule against the bus being early?...nope, the door is shutting, and I'm not close enough..."

So I had a choice... do I abandon my fear of looking uncontrolled and uncool and run for it? Waving my arms, dragging my oversized school bag, hair flying in my self-created wind? Or do I just keep clacking down the sidewalk and turn back across campus to the parking lot? In which case, my mindframe becomes, "A bus? I never saw a bus. I don't ride the bus. Why would I notice? I drive my car to school. Why else would I have a car if not to drive it to the places I go? You so CRAZY, fool."

What do YOU think I did? To be continued...

Bring on the rain!

Supposedly, there is rain coming. With heat in the triple digits every day for the past, oh, I don't know, thousand weeks, it will be nice if the meteorologists are right and a cold front comes with storms that take the temperatures down to the low 90s.

Really, though, I don't even notice the heat much anymore. I have lived in Texas all my life and am accustomed to some seriously hot summers (even as they get hotter, apparently from global warming, a theory of which I'm not convinced). My being accustomed to our extreme heat, however, is saved for moments like yesterday, when my seat belt buckle burned me. It was the plastic part, too, not even the metal part. I touched it for like, 0.002 seconds, and I have a stupid blister on my thumb. THAT, I notice.

(boo you, rising mercury)

I've gotten used to the heat in my personal life too. In fact, over the same period of time that it has been 100+ every day, it seems like one thing after another for me, and it's been constant enough that I've accepted this heat as the new normality in my life. I only get reminded of how unbearable it really is when something unexpectedly jumps up and burns me, the way my seatbelt did yesterday. At that moment, I am usually guilty of having an irrational reaction, whether it be letting a bad word slip or bursting into tears. Or being violent toward inanimate, usually solid objects that are in fact NOT scared of me (that's never a good road).

It seems that in these moments, when I finally realize how much I need a break from the heat, God sends me peace through a refresher. A rain storm, a note from my husband-to-be, an encourager at the office. It's in those moments that I know that while I can't control what happens to the proverbial temperature, I can control the way I handle it. And furthermore, not being so self absorbed leaves me open to be the refresher that God is sending to other people in the midst of their own firestorms. There's nothing greater than that!

(top 3 favorite refresher- forgot to warn you!)

I am still, however, doing secret rain dances in my office chair today. I wish I had one of those rain sticks. That would be a hit among my coworkers for sure.

Loss, then something more enjoyable

**I don't always intend for this blog to be so serious, by the way. It's just that a lot of serious things are happening right now and I am forming thoughts about them on my own for the first time.**

I guess I never did blog about last weekend, and now this weekend is upon me instead. For my family, this week has been a roller coaster. Loss will do that to you, I suppose, since everyone deals with it differently. Some like to stay busy, making plans and following through with previous commitments. Others need time just to sit and absorb what has become their new truth, while still others cope by sitting with those people and holding their hand, if just to feel like they have a purpose within the madness.

Stop the madness!

Tragedy can bring out the best and the worst in people, I guess. It can be inspiring and disheartening all in one breath. And this does lead to a whirlwind of emotions that leaves you lost and squinting and out of air. The human spirit is resilient, though, and after a while, life twists you back into a sense of normality, even if you're never quite the same after learning what you have.

That being said, I have trouble imagining what loss would be like without believing in God. There are times that I have literally prayed to feel as safe and peaceful as if I'd crawled up in God's lap. He is comfort and love and wisdom in times of sadness.

(One of my goals is to learn to better articulate the way that I love God, and the way that He loves us. I guess that is a subject for another post, though. )

On a lighter note- what about the weekend? Well, tonight Dillon and I have game night and dinner with some of our friends. It is so nice to have couple friends to hang out with. It is something I have truly underestimated in the past, and something I never want to be without now, wherever we end up. Tomorrow is the funeral and then MPA orientation at UNT. I registered for my classes yesterday, finally, and they are going to be fantastic. My first one is next Thursday.

This is what I'm supposed to chant now.

These plans are all stemming from the (false?) hope that I will in fact make it through the day without being killed by the bouncy, aggressive, disgusting crickets that are infesting our office once again.

We'll see, crickets.

My first video post!

I'm going to post soon about the weekend and such, but in the meantime, meet Dillon. This is him attempting to beat my score on Bubble Pop this weekend. I crack up every time because I think he looks like he is calculating numbers at a breakneck speed, and because he tries to keep a straight face but can't. Enjoy!

Half of a whole

Six months ago today (around this very time of day in fact) I became 1/2 of a betrothed couple.

When I look back on that day, it's just as perfect as ever in my mind. Throughout adolescence, you wonder the way in which you will get engaged. A scavenger hunt? A romantic dinner? On the Kiss Me cam at the game? The element that was so special about my engagement was how thoroughly Dillon planned the day, and the fact that he was still nervous even though he already knew I'd say yes.

That day was one of the happiest of my life. For someone to accept you wholly for who you are and to choose to love and commit to you, forever... that's quite a feeling. Since the engagement, our days have ranged from equally as happy to downright difficult. The stress that exists in some parts of my life right now is as thick as syrup, certainly moreso than I've ever known. Without Dillon pulling me through the muck over the last month, praying with me and blanketing me with support, some days I would be laboring hard just to take a calm, deep breath. And for the first time, I realize that it's okay to acknowledge that.

I'm the lone half of the couple with diamonds on my ring finger for now. But I'm far from alone. I still have a great family. And now, I have a pillar of a partner who is sharing the load and helping me lift buckets of cement as we pour a brand new, strong foundation for the life we will start together...not too far away now.

For the whole proposal story, you can visit mywedding.com/dillonandchristianne and click on 'Our Story.'

Let's get this straight...

The title of this blog is totally theoretical.

In no way am I a seamstress, professional OR by hobby. I have, sadly, been out-crocheted many times over by my little sister (who I'm sure, one day, will have her own money-raking Etsy website because she's just THAT creative). This is not a blog that will chronicle my journey into quilting or where you'll see weekly updates of my latest fabrics.

I just like the idea of life as a quilt. I even googled "quotes about quilts" and found the saying that is at the top of the page, just to drive home what my point really is with that title.

I guess it's interesting when you start to grow up. You look back on what you thought your experiences were and a lot of times you see something different. A major disappointment was a huge blessing in disguise. Something that broke you in the moment made you strong for someone else down the road. A kind gesture shaped the way you now look to be treated, or the way you strive to treat others.

Maybe that's why I'm deciding to take the time to write about the moments in my own life again. A lot is happening right now that I'd like to be able to look back on, because maybe I can learn from this stuff later on the way that I'm learning from my past right now.

When I say "a lot is happening," it's just that I have a few of what the insurance companies deem "major life events" coming up here in the next year-ish. I'm starting graduate school in two weeks and that will be my new reality for the next year and a half. I'm moving in three weeks to a new little town I've never lived in, although it isn't far from where I went to college. I just took a program coordinator position at TWU, which means my career is actually beginning. And most importantly, I'm getting married in November.

See why I need to keep a blog to document the process of adding these new patches to my life's quilt? We ARE all stitched lovingly together. Each moment is significant.